Between the bars

Fears

I try to do things that will give some sence to my life. But, i feel that life’s passing us by while we are busy swipping credit cards.

Knowledge, i believe is the greatest proof of your existemce. People read a lot of books to gain knowledge. We get the “news” Papers daily, telling us what all has happened and is happening around us, which school to go to (because its the first preference of the richest parents ), which course to chose (it’ll help me get a good job,so, i can earn a living for me and my family, send my children to the “best schools”, so that they’ll join the best institutes later).

I don’t consider myself as a fatalist, but i know how fragile a life is and how easily it can lose it’s meaning. All around i see people who can be so much more, but they just don’t realize that.

“Drink up baby,
stay up all night
with the things you could do.
You won’t,
but, you might“

-Elliot Smith

If only we didn’t have so many fears.

-Sachin Suresh Pratap Singh

Whatever must've happened...

“Forgiveness, redemption salvation and more”

I begged and i cried as my Pride hit the floor.

Breathing and bleeding, alive and awake,

disguised as a Sin such a perfect mistake.

I hold on to this life ‘a Boy’ Now ‘a man’.

 Your shits gonna scatter when it hits the fan

Make and Break, the rules of our time.

Honest mistakes, my biggest crimes.

 Buckets for the ocean, eyes for the land.

 ”I really care”..if not? just pretend.

 9 lives or 2 nights just give me a choice.

Feels like i can touch you when i hear your voice.

Helpless and reluctant my face on the wall.

 A garland to cherish the day of my fall.

“Sachin Suresh Pratap Singh”

Early in the Morning
As i rose up to my Feet
I heard a loud Noise
That came from the Toilet Seat

It was the Squeal of a Spider
A Spider Big And Strong
And thats my Favorite Spider
the Protagonist of my Song

It was a chilly summer day
And you know it’s kind of rare
I was sitting quitely
And i never meant to stare

But here was this Big Spide
With a suitcase in his Hand
Don’t leave me o Spidey
Why don’t you understand?

Spiders in my Toilet
Polar Bears in the Living -Room
The day starts-up as Scarlet
But always ends in Gloom.

“Sachin Suresh Pratap Singh”

                              So, now i’ve started getting these dreams, ‘Nightmares’ they call it. I was outside her flat, 1 am. I was hidding in the shade. She knew that i was there at 10 pm and had said good night to me. Said she’ll be going for coffee with her cousin’s husband.

                              I thought it was cool. i thought everything was cool. That’s the thing that used to give me a little peace of mind. A little used to be enough in those times. But, something inside me wanted to stay there. I’m cynical. Sometimes i doubt myself. And most of the times i’m right.

                             I stood there, outside. Hiding, like i always do. One thing that never fails to amuse me is the way people can be like totally different person altogether with different people. Pretend or just natural. Not sure honey.

                             It was dark already. No cousin’s husband. What was i thinking?  She must be feeling awkward telling me that she’ll be going to bed now. I should stop being so skeptic about her.

                             It was 1:30 am. I saw her in a Dak Pink dress. She was wearing  dark pink salwar suit with heavy bangles on her wrist and same colored ear rings. She was laughing. Laughing at the people passing by. There were none. The road was empty. I moved. The leaves crumbled. She saw me.

                             I saw a motorcycle headlight comming our way. It was him. My absence made her happy. but she seemed happy when she was with me, when she knew what was going through my head. She seemed to like it. She wanted me to keep feeling that way. Her “Bromide”.

“Sachin Suresh Pratap Singh”